


livewire

by carminnat



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, F/M, Past Relationship(s), tragic backstory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-07
Updated: 2016-11-07
Packaged: 2018-08-29 14:37:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8493703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carminnat/pseuds/carminnat
Summary: The Swan tamed the Soldier; the Soldier guarded the Swan - it was one of the very few good things to come out of their time in HYDRA. The first on that list for him would always be her.





	

**Siberia, Seven Years Ago.**

“ _Soldat._ ” Her voice was hardly above a whisper, but so clearly tinged with fear. He swore he felt a tug in his chest.

He turned to her. He swore every time he did, he couldn’t help but be reminded of what she was. She was just _a girl._ Yet somehow, the darkness permanently etched into her eyes matured her in a way—the blood on her hands all the more affecting. 

Yes, he had seen very well what this _girl_ was capable of. He’d taught her everything she knew. She fought at his side when a mission was deemed too steep. 

But now, with her stare wide and unsure, her shoulders stiff and hands folded in front of her, he felt an urge he was not bound to feel. It had happened before—numerous times, actually. And with every daunting task, with the fear of being pulled back into an abyss, she tiptoed her way to his quarters. 

The Soldier said nothing. Instead, with a short exhale of breath, he pulled the girl into his arms. She cried softly into his chest, her hands fisting in his shirt. He waited for her grip to come loose before he’d walk her back to her quarters. 

He never left her with false promises. _They won’t hurt you. Everything is going to be okay._ But he did leave her with silent hope that she would be freed.

**Berlin, Five Months Ago.**

Y/N broke into sprint down long halls and staircases upon being notified of the breach: Barnes had escaped; the Winter Soldier had engaged, and Task Force headquarters was being evacuated. 

She heard Natasha’s voice through her earpiece. “We’re in position.”

They had eyes on him. “Where?” Y/N asked.

“Atrium near the northwest stairway,” Sharon Carter replied.

Y/N quickened her pace, reverting to vaulting over railings until she could spot the forefront of the commotion. _He was compromised,_ she couldn’t help but repeatedly declare in her head. _He was compromised by someone, somehow._ She knew there was the very possibility that she could stop him from inflicting more trouble than he was already pinned for. She knew he was innocent. She knew how hard he must’ve fought to stay out of the radar in the past two years since he’d fled from HYDRA. She knew, because she’d already been through it all herself. All he only wanted was to remember.

And now, she considered the possibility that he remembered _her_. But it had been years. They’d already gone through wipe after wipe since then. If he didn’t? Well, she was about to find out.

She arrived the second he had Natasha pinned down on a table, his cybernetic hand locked around her throat. Y/N sprung into action, barely overlooking the consequences of it. She had never fought him in the past, but she did know his pattern. He taught her his pattern.

So she threw a hard blow to his ribs, forcing his grip off Natasha and attention to Y/N. He threw a countering strike at her and she managed to dodge it easily. She kicked, pushed, punched, until he pinned her against a wall, his robotic arm pressed across her shoulders. She gasped and raised her hands to grip at his, averting to subside her squirming and fighting until she was sure his eyes were focused on hers.

“ _Soldat,_ ” she said simply, albeit shakily.

His chest heaved as his breathing became shallow. He blinked, once, twice, until his eyes narrowed with recognition. “ _Lebed…_ ”

Y/N let out a breath of relief, nodding, sure to keep their stare locked as he loosened his grip on her. “Yes, yes! It’s me. Focus on me. Just-”

But his attention averted to something behind him. He seemed to sense it, because he grabbed her by the shoulder and shoved her aside. She’d only caught a glimpse of T’Challa pouncing on him before the two had disappeared up the staircase. She scrambled to her feet, perhaps to declare that she could stop all of this. But she sighed instead, turning to the rest of the team behind her.

She crossed over to aid Natasha, who had gotten back up on her feet, her fingers rubbing circles over her throat. Her green eyes narrowed at Y/N as she approached, a frown on her lips. “You stopped him,” Natasha said.

Y/N pursed her lips. “Barely.”

The corner of the redhead’s lips twitched upward. “If you had another second, you would’ve, right?”

Y/N sucked in a breath and glanced away; back at the stairway where he had been. “I guess so.”

**Wakanda, Four Months Ago.**

Steve had notified Bucky about his venture to the Raft days before he had even left. Bucky swore he’d felt the protests forming in his mouth—that Steve wouldn’t be able to do it alone. But he was in no way able to make it out of Wakanda without various world powers threatening to stick a bullet through his skull.

“And I’m not gonna do it alone,” Steve assured him. 

Of course. There were only two newly-appointed fugitives who had managed to flee government capture after the stint that allowed Bucky and Steve on the jet to Siberia. One was Romanoff. The other was Y/N.  

Her name was Y/N L/N. Not _Lebed_. She had long since departed from that name after HYDRA had fallen two years ago. Yes, the thought of her was a common occurrence in the time since he had started running. He’d even tried to decrypt the files Romanoff had leaked unto the internet to find out more about his former protégée and partner. But she was almost as ghostly as he was; she had seemingly fallen off the face of the earth since Project Insight.

He had asked Steve about recruiting Y/N as an Avenger on very few occasions since they’d arrived in Wakanda. 

“We were looking for you,” Steve had told him. “Most of our leads were dead ends, so it made sense this one would be, too. But the trail ended up leading to her.”

The words left a tug in Bucky’s chest; a tug that felt so familiar when it came to Y/N.

“It took a lot for her to admit her history with you,” Steve continued. “But once she did, she offered us some help. She said that you’d always been good at hiding a trail, if not for the right people.”

Bucky recalled the tactics he and Y/N had in their days as partners. If they ended up separated somehow, he was always sure to leave a trail only for her to decipher. And he never had a doubt that she could.

She returned the favour in a different way, but one that he could always remember. The last time it had happened wasn’t long ago. He’d suddenly become aware of his grip on her and the fact that she was not his enemy. She could have stopped the Winter Soldier that day, just as she had in the past. 

He’d burrowed himself in his thoughts the past few weeks since the others had been tossed in the Raft. The same went for Y/N and Romanoff, because they’d all since found something to call home. They’d all since found something to call a family. They had all sacrificed so much for his chance at solace. He was definitely not worth any of it.

Seeing Y/N for the first time since the battle at Leipzig brought back exactly what thoughts pestered him day and night. She was strolling along the halls, side-by-side with Steve, and her eye had caught his. He watched as her jaw set, as her expression slightly softened. He could tell she was watching him, too.

They spoke that night. They found themselves in a room alone, and she had wrapped her arms around herself as if she was cold. The same way she had all those years ago. She broke the silence with a small, almost shy, “Hi.”

Bucky couldn’t help but be a little amused. This was the same girl who had the ability to detain the Winter Soldier. This was the same girl who had pushed her limits to get on his level of expertise. This was the same girl who used to come to him in cold nights when she was afraid or simply in need of human contact, and here she was, telling him “Hi” as if they were strangers.

“Y/N,” he said, testing her name on his tongue for the first time in front of her. “That’s your name, right?”

The corner of her lip twitched upward. “It is,” she confirmed. “And you’re James. James Buchanan Barnes.”

“And here I was putting all the effort into remembering just your first name,” he attempted to jest. It did elicit a laugh from her; a sound in which seemed so foreign and familiar at once.

“So, how have you been, Bucky?” she asked, setting herself down on a couch and tucking one of her legs under her. 

He sat on the opposite end, sucking in a breath at her question—the same question people seemed afraid to ask him for their own (perhaps very similar) reasons. “You mean besides being dangerously high on the radar?”

A ghost of a smirk remained on her lips. “You’d think that’d faze me, but quite frankly we’ve got more than just one common ground.”

Her words prodded a smile from him. “Well, to answer your question… I don’t know.” Her smile broadened with another soft laugh. “So what are you doing here? Last I heard, the others went to pick up whatever mess we left.”

She let out a huff of breath. “I guess that route would have been preferable if I wasn’t so damn exhausted,” she said. “It’d be nice to lay low for a little bit. And hopefully…” She was looking down now, her lashes batting as if whatever she was to say next were that flustering. “Help out an old friend along the way.”

Bucky watched her again. She raised her stare back up to his, confident this time. So she did indeed know about his aim to recover—to be as close to the man he once was before his apparent death. His expression fell to one of a warning. A warning to her. “It’s not gonna be easy.”

She offered him another smile; this one of assurance, of truth. “When has it ever been easy for the both of us?”

That was all she really needed to say for him to silently accept.

**Wakanda, Present Day.**

Bucky waited as the doctors roamed around the room, studying him. Y/N stood in front of him, her shoulders relaxed and hands folded in front of her. She seemed so sure, so optimistic about the plausible outcome of this coming test.

These tests were particularly rare. The doctors knew very well the damage that could be done if not performed correctly. But they all knew—the doctors, Steve, Bucky, Y/N. The Swan tamed the Soldier; the Soldier guarded the Swan. It was one of the very few good things to come out of their time in HYDRA.

The first on that list for him would always be her.

In the months since they’d reunited, Bucky found himself utterly taken with the girl. It was bound to happen, maybe, but with such a broad history with her, it was decidedly best kept to himself. Yet the link between them told him much more was on her side as well.

Soft lips pressed against his, her fingers threaded through his hair. It had happened late one night, when he had become far too overwhelmed and when the ghosts somehow found a way to scream louder. She was there within minutes. She had calmed him.

That night became his will to fight his untrusted mind harder.

And now here he was, being signalled that they were ready. He saw in her eyes the question: _Are you ready?_

He shut his eyes as the words filled his brain, practically begging not to let them clamor him.

_Longing. Rusted._

He felt a cool hand over his, fingers grazing over his knuckles.

_Seventeen. Daybreak. Furnace._

The figure felt closer to him now, her body radiating warmth. Her hand clasped over his.

_Nine. Benign._

She said something. His name, he thought, and he felt himself grip her hand tighter.

_One._

“Focus on me,” he heard. Her other hand rested on his chest, feeling for the beat of his heart, which raced faster at her touch.

_Freight car._

His eyes opened. He stared down at hers, which were wide in both fear and hope. 

“Bucky?” she whispered.

He let a breath of relief in reminiscent of her name and pulled her taut against him. She gladly returned his embrace, burrowing her face into the crook of his neck.


End file.
